Some News Better Than No News

Yet again I've let this little project - what is supposed to be helping me in my recovery - lapse; this time it's been more than 4 months since my last post or tweet. As I said in a post earlier this year, no news means bad news...and these past months have proven little exception.

Bad news includes: plenty of sometimes nasty but necessary fights with my wife, unnecessarily losing my temper with my kids (nothing threatening by any means, but it pisses me off), virtually zero progress on the job hunt and many whole days , no job hunt progress, abused meds, whole days spent on the couch or in bed.

On the other hand, good news I've got to remember includes: I'm still with my wife and two boys, I'm fairly sure my wife still loves (and not just tolerates) me, I'm essentially smoke free and have started the long and (I fear) painful process of getting off of methadone, and my sister (after I finally came out of denial about not needing help) is helping in a big way in starting my job hunt for real.

The whole point of this blog (well, half of it at least, the other being to share my experiences with others) was to help me in my recovery by providing me with a regular routine, an always accessible outlet for getting things off my chest that I can't with friends or family, an ongoing record of my progress (and setbacks) and more.

But for it to work in any of these capacities effectively, the key words are regular, routine, ongoing, consistent, etc. I've got to type something on these pages...even a single sentence...every day, or at least close to it. Without doing so, not only will it be of little help to me, but as any blog expert will tell you, it won't serve its other purpose (the sharing part) because I won't have any readers.

Like so many other aspects of my life, I know what I've got to do. It's not hard to do. The benefits are multi-fold and the requirements are simple. The question is...can I do it?

PS...I can't help but ask, if I can't manage a committment as minor as this, what does that say about my committment to recovery? Can you feel the self-confidence oozing from my every pore?